Last night the grifting gods were kind to us. We visited our buddies in Fields while they were recording an EP. While there we bought some pre-packaged sandwiches from a super market. Little did we know, a grift was in the work.
You see, sometimes, you can just smell the grift. You walk into a place, see some bread in the moonlight and just know... this bread will be in a dumpster in 35 minutes. Last night was one of those nights, but alas, this bread can not go in a dumpster. It must go in our bellies, in Henry and Matty and the rest of the Fields's bellies, it must go into Ben Kweller's belly. It must go in bellies!!!
Sure enough, it did. Here is a brief list of the grift kitty:
more croissants than a rioting frenchman can handle
other types of awesome cookies
some pastry that I didn't get to try
It felt invigorating. People often say that fresh bread is the best. I wonder if these people have ever tasted free stale bread that you rescued from the dumpster. It is as sporadic as a veggie burger in Texas and as delicious as a detox smoothie the morning after your 21st birthday party. you jive? It almost makes me want to only eat free bread, because bread that I pay for can never taste nearly as good. Let me tell you something else, this bread was something for the weekend if you know what I mean... Don't try to get Starbucks bread though, unless a real 'I don't give a shit' type of slacker kid is working there because they always say that they are scared you will sue them if you get a tummy-ache. While this is the first grocery store bread we have attempted to get, I feel as though it is an untapped market in our grifting to this point. They were quite nice, and I could tell, the manager did not want to see those croissants go to waste. Such a kind soul.
also of note: I think we are all in agreement that Sam is the best table-tennis/ping-pong player